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It’s been over a year since I wrote here last.

I used to love to write. I could write passionately about a lot of things, have some kind of insight on a topic. I could feel good about what I wrote because it was something that I believed in or knew something about.

These days… and for a few years now… I’ve come to accept that there are no answers and there are no truths in this world. I used to think that I knew so much about life and the world but now I realize that I know nothing about anything. I realize that life is inherently without value or meaning. And that makes me sad.

So incredibly sad.

Hollywood Continues To Lie To Me…

I see so many fucking movies set back in ages where indoor plumbing was not even a twinkle in the eye of the greatest minds of the time… and there are sex scenes. These sex scenes are always so perfectly portrayed like some kind of PG rated porno film… but there are so many historical realities of the time that are not reflected. Even remotely!

All it takes to bring this home to me is if I go an entire weekend without a shower, then scratch my own taint and accidentally raise my hand anywhere near my nose. I mean…. DAMN. Humans do not smell good unless we be showering or bathing every second date MAX. My nuts tell me that three days is beyond the limit for my own personal freshness. I almost want to stop scratching myself.

 

Quiet

It’s been a week since I last exchanged messages with her; a month since I last heard her voice. And, even now, I imagine everything we’ve ever exchanged and see her in every image that I view. She stole my heart years ago and it will remain with her always, even though we will never be together. I know she is the one for me, meant for me but that ‘we’ can never be.