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Author Archives: Cellar Heat
It Has Nothing To Do With Homophobia…
…I just don’t want anyone talking to me while I’m trying to poop. It creeps me the fuck out.
When I enter that stall, I have entered the Cone Of Silence™ and conversation is not only a faux pas but it is a cardinal sin; morally reprehensible behavior that cannot be condoned.
Is it because I’m sitting there with my pants around my ankles and am basically half naked? And that I don’t want another dude talking to me while I’m half naked? No. It’s because pooping is a private activity that I don’t ever want another person to be privy to. Ever.
Cellar Heat
August 2, 2012
I seem to have forgotten how to code simple HTML!!! Seriously???
I have been out of the game too long.
When I Was Young
There was a time when I was attractive. But it was a long time ago and I didn’t even know it at the time. The only reason that I know it now is because I have gained weight and aged. I am not attractive. I am barely a man.
The Cold Shower
Our gas was cut off on Thursday. I only owed just over $234 and my bill was overdue but not horrendous. So the gas man came and turned it off. I made the full payment but the damage was already done. I would be put in the queue to get reconnected… which won’t happen until Wednesday.
So there would be no barbecue on Canada Day and no hot showers all long weekend. Today, I tried to have a cold shower. And it was as brutal as one can imagine. In the absence of warm water, I used our electric kettle to warm up a couple of massive bowls of water to wash my hair and body with… adequate given the level of my filth but not the same as a shower.
I have to return to work tomorrow after the long weekend and there will be no hot water. This means that I will have to take a cold shower tomorrow morning. Will I even need to have a coffee after this? We’ll see.
